"playfully" (villanelle)
No end is in sight
I wake before dawn
& playfully write
my winnings so slight
my losings grew long
no ending in sight
the beauty of night
quiescent & strong
I playfully write
how towering your height
how shallow my song
what end were in sight?
the history of light
sought many a tongue
to playfully write
while flying a kite
whose flight were but young
no ending in sight
I playfully write
I wake before dawn
& playfully write
my winnings so slight
my losings grew long
no ending in sight
the beauty of night
quiescent & strong
I playfully write
how towering your height
how shallow my song
what end were in sight?
the history of light
sought many a tongue
to playfully write
while flying a kite
whose flight were but young
no ending in sight
I playfully write
posted by david raphael israel at 9:21 AM
3 Comments:
Hi, thanks for dropping by. You got some great stuff going here! What's the difference between a haiku anbd a tri-ku?
Gunther--
this tri-ku is a new form I've invented; I outlined some techno-details when posting the 1st, here:
funnel haiku 1
-- in terms of form, it uses a specific syllable-count structure (if you read any of these & count the syllables, you'll note they always follow that "form"). Readers are not expected necessarily to "count" when reading; but the structuring principle affects the rhythms of the writing (it -- one could say -- "prestructures" how one writes). Am simply experimenting with this. Such a principle is used in Japanese poetics (not only for Haiku, but also various other forms); I've only lately taken an interest in the possibilities for this in English (in terms of new forms). That curiousity happened to coincide w/ this new blogging activity. Longish answer, tho more could be said .;-)
keep dreaming--
cheers, d.i.
ps: I should also have noted that in Japanese, a Haiku is always a stand-alone 3-line poem structured with 5-syllables / 7-syllables / 5-syllables for the 3 lines. Many (not all) English-lang. practitioners (emulators) of the Japanese form will follow those syllabic-count strictures. With this tri-ku experiment, I'm exploring this a bit further in English: how such a restriction affects the feel of the poem. The tri-ku (aka funnel haiku) works with shorter lines as the poem proceeds -- in principle (i.e. perhaps in theory) "essentializing" as it goes. Hence the possibility of some "punch" in end (hopefully not a sock in the eye, but more punching a hole into some larger space-of-reflection) -- though I overstate the case for effect. Poetics (principles of poetic technique) seem prob. best seen in practice [more than in overly-explanatory notes such as this]; but this oddment could prove thought-provoking in some quarter. [Though this tri-ku's rather fledgling to bear weight of so longwinded an explicatory breeze. Prick me, & an explainer seeps out?]
cheers, d.i.
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