"enough time" (ghazal)
time was : there was enough time
because : there was enough time
the hourglass one-way journey
undoes : there was enough time
the gist of the lies of the flies?
their buzz : there was enough time
the flowers lamented the hours
faint lust in the dusting of time
the autumns remembered the springs
what was it one does with the time?
why's every endeavor distorted?
because : there's not enough time!
the temporal dress grew threadbare
this wasn't : there was enough time
how the box of time becomes empty
it doesn't dream up enough time
nor wit nor spit nor money
give up there was enough time
half stream half dream this music
how does it anticipate time?
the Space-wife lives forever!
her husband was enough : Time
if "endless" should ironize endless
which was : what was enough time?
so the hare's soon passing the tortoise?
it doesn't nonplus (enough time)
the joy of the athlete & thief
is just : there was enough time!
when the train departed the station
did cussing give us enough time?
who could step two times in one river?
did you sus : there's not enough time?
yes much is contained in the Talmud
yet does it discuss enough : time?
enough words! (the silent one gestured)
who suffers recovers in time
the rub-a-dub-tub was a clubhouse
where Bubba could bluff enough time
in the higgledy-piggledy pub
it's shuffling-to-Buffalo time
Godiva : who rode through the village
was buff on the bluff enough times
wherever you look there's a mirror
for us : it wasn't of time
precocious in youth : now the graybeard
finesses the pluses of time
subtraction became the solution
dissolving the cussing of time
the twirling gyro was spinning
we trusted the cusp of the time
why rankle the ranks of the burnt-out?
for us : there wasn't much [time]
in the circles infernal : did Dante
discuss if there was enough time?
the rising & setting so stately
God must grant us enough time!
the heavenly plan converged
for Brahm : there was enough time
the ocean suddenly surged
Sat Nam : there was enough time
a circular pattern emerged
because : there was enough time
though hustle & bustle may tussle
the bus said : bas! enough time!
in this yug : do they jog in the womb?
"what a fuss! yet there was enough time!"
Ardeo! quit messing with ghazals!
it doesn't leave us enough time!
[written -- um -- in haste]
Brahm (Hindi): the Creator (= Brahma [Skt.])
Sat Nam (Punjabi, etc.): lit. "the Name of Truth" (a conventional expression of blessing and God-remembrance among Sikhs; the expression traces back to the ecstatic poetry of Guru Nanak)
bas (Farsi/Urdu): "enough!"
yug (Hindi) : age, era (= yuga [Skt.])
[In this poem, I was a bit fast & loose with the ghazal structure, admittedly sacrificing some rigor for sake of more muchness. Generally speaking, these days I prefer to be more rigorous with it; but sometimes one lets one's hair down, so to speak. It has some of the imperfections of a doodle, no doubt.]
posted by david raphael israel at 4:42 PM
6 Comments:
This was such fun! All the references worked well. The first sher took me back to Marvell's Coy Mistress.
I'm quite rigorous myself when it comes to the ghazal, but I think a little loosening does it no harm.
Glad you approve -- and follow references & whatnot to boot.
I've never read the Marvel poem through (though now am beholden so to do). Of course have seen the opening couplet quoted.
My 1st sher here is millimeters-close to being a classic tautology, presumably (in philosphy, a decided fallacy). But in a poem like this, that hardly counts for a sin (& I'm not convinced it's purely tautological anyway).
Prosody note: like the "unclosed door" ghazal, this one too doubles a single rhyme syllable (vowel) within the line itself. I've in past practiced multiple rhyming with differing vowels in a ghazal; but using the identical one appears to have its own bouncy effect; possibly this contributes to a "hypnotic" aspect, as sound?
As noted, this lacks rigor. I could select a dozen or so couplets that all follow the pattern flawlessly. Instead I opted for a wider tent / bigger canvas.
grazie, d.i.
This is brilliant. Great reference to Dante and the Talmud--what concepts. I'd like to print this one out.
Thanks En.
Dante I feel reasonable about (not that I've absorbed the whole Divine Comedy, or really even Inferno). The Talmud, must admit, was tossed in more for effect (& breadth); I don't know enough of its contents to write so knowingly (as this suggests) about what it does/doesn't say. But in the flush of invention, sometimes one doesn't let a small thing like factual ignorance halt the train of thought! (as it were).
cheers, d.i.
Ghazal's are so intimidating to me, and I have to try writing one.
I think this is one of the best ghazals I've read so far besides Osherow's Comet: Ghazal. I haven't read a lot of ghazals; I don't think many poets write in the form yet, but I enjoyed this one.
Agha Ali really brought ghazals to the forefront, but I don't like the ones I've read of his.
Somehow it seems disconnected, which I know is somehow the way the ghazal is, with each line independent, but I think your version reads much more smoother.
Will be foraging into your archives more in the future. I saw that you also wrote some villanelles, another tough one in my opinion.
Thanks again MS --
there have been varied efforts toward the ghazal now and again on this blog, of varying quality!
Of course the English ghazal is still a young, developing idea.
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