"Winter's chill" [bommerang]
Life passed me by although I still am living
I live amid the lull of winter's chill
a stinginess she weaves into her giving
an emptiness I find no way to fill
nocturnal streetlamps shine forever brightly
forgotten ballads talk about forgiving
so many efforts none of them went rightly
life passed me by although I still am living
[Composed yesterday while walking & waiting for the 16th Street bus toward midnight; memorized; then typed after arriving home; and revised today.]
This follows the Chinese form; -- note hints of grammatical parallelism in the two central couplets. In strict classical style in Chinese, both couplets show full parallelism.
In English (what with less rudimentary grammar & polysyllabic words), I merely approximate or hint at the principle: e.g. (as here) exhibiting it in initial portions of the lines -- thus:
a stinginess she weaves
an emptiness I find [a perfect example];
or thus:
nocturnal streetlamps shine
forgotten songs yet talk [an imperfect example, due to the word "yet". Ah, but I will change it to "ballads" (2 syllables) to make it a perfect example; so, that's the final revision.]
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